The Tale of Death

I am a silent spectator; I watch but am sure to never interfere. I laugh and I cry with you, but you never know I’m there. Most fear me, and implore that I leave them be. Others of the more despondent variety crave an appointment with me. However one thing people fail to realize is that I decline all invitations offered, I will turn up when I am ready, invited or not. I control all the bad in your life, some deserve the suffering they feel, and others need it to better understand themselves. I apologize for this, the down side to my job I’m afraid. However when you secure a meeting with me I will be sure to explain the reason behind your journey. By now I presume you are curious as to just who, or even what I am. If you are of the intelligent sort and have it all figured out, than I suppose you are questioning why someone of my caliber would take the time to communicate with you.

I am known by an assortment of identities; Azrael, Osiris, Hades and quite simply Death. However due to the fear I have noticed these names induce, I prefer to go simply by the name of Craven. Now, you may enquire into my reasoning behind communication with someone who, as of yet is not on my guest list. Don’t panic, you are perfectly safe for the time being. I simply wish to share with you a story, my story, though also another’s. A woman’s.

I despise beginnings that describe the weather, and how wondrous the symphony of song birds is. These little observations a very closed minded and unimaginative. However, I know not of a way to portray the scene in terms that would be understandable to those of the non ethereal sort. You can not even begin to imagine how limited your perspective of the environment is. So we will begin as most narratives do. With a portrayal of the scenery.

A light fog blanketed everything in sight, moist cloudy tendrils reaching under doors and squeezing between cracks in windows. The air was glacial, forcing even the most resistant to cold, to rug up. I ambled down the suburban streets enjoying the cold dampness of the air. Apart from a stray car or two, the streets were completely abandoned. Just the way I liked it. I ran a hand through my damp ash blond mane, mind for once clear of thoughts and emotions. The loud caw of a raven caused me to glance up. It circled overhead, glossy ebony feathers shimmering despite the lack of light. My mouth upturned into a sort of half smile, as I watched the animal swoop down towards me, pulling up at the last minute and beginning to circle all over again. A deep chuckle somehow found its way from my mouth as I pulled my dark trench coat closer to my body.
“I’ve never seen anything like that In my life.” I halted, startled by a light female voice.
Turning, I opened my mouth to reply but she cut me off. “I’m surprised to see anyone else out in this weather.”
A frown creased my brow as I replied. “As am I.” The very fact that she had noticed me was odd, unless I drew attention to myself or wished for someone to perceive me they weren’t able to.  

She bit her lip, nervously tugging at a strand of burgundy hair. “Well, ahh… I’ll leave you to it.”
I tilted my head, ignoring the raven as it landed by my feet. “Why are you out here?”
She seemed startled by the harshness of my voice. “Just…. Walking.” She shifted her weight, averting her gaze.
The raven ruffled its feathers, impatiently nipping at my boot. “Walking?”
She gave an unsure nod. “Yep, just walking.”
I narrowed my eyes, roughly nudging the raven with my foot. “And yet you have been pushed so far as to consider doing something terrible.”
Her head snapped up, light grey eyes becoming as large as saucers. “What?”
I felt nothing but a painful hopelessness radiating off of her and it made my heart drop. “Death will come when he is ready to come; he is never late nor is he ever early. The pain won’t be forever, live your life and embrace joy, no matter how elusive it may seem.”
She scoffed, shivering slightly at the cold. “Easy for you to say, you’re attractive and obviously have money,” She tugged at my coat. “Have you ever known what it’s like to be unloved?”
“I can state with confidence that, yes, I know how it feels to be unloved.”
“Well I think that bird loves you.” She gestured to the raven, who had perched himself on a nearby fence paling, pale blue eyes studying me.
I had already said more to this woman then was permitted of me; it was the job of the guardians to help counsel mortals. However there was something about her, apart from her apparent ability to perceive a celestial being, which captured my attention.

“If only he was capable of such emotion, that bird there, is just doing his duty.”
She gave me a puzzled expression. “Right…. Because birds have set jobs.”
I smirked. ”Not all birds, just certain types.”
She began to giggle, grey eyes filling with tears. “My god, what are you, a lunatic?”
I shrugged, allowing the restless raven to perch on my shoulder. “I’ve been labeled worse. Now come, let’s get a warm beverage to warm us up.”
She nodded silently the grin fading from her face.

We huddled in a small coffee shop for warmth, the aroma of freshly roasted coffee beans truly tantalizing. I sighed, as I took a large sip from my sugarless espresso, the bitterness sending pleasurable zings across my palette.  
The woman watched my vigilantly, her gaze scrutinizing my every movement. “Who are you?”
Smiling I carefully placed my mug back on its saucer. “That is a very broad question that could result in many responses. Though, I assume you want to know how to address me? Call me Craven.”
“Craven? That’s it?” Her brow creased.
I shrugged. “That’s all you need to know, may I inquire into your identity?”
She gingerly took a sip of her hot chocolate, eyes still watching me. “Dawn, my name’s Dawn.”
I gave a nod, glancing out of the foggy window.
“Craven, I don’t want to be rude or anything but…” She glanced down at her hands. “You’re weird, I mean that thing with the bird was just plain freaky. And now you’re just sorta sitting there, staring into my soul with those… Those eyes.”
I tilted my head with amusement. “What’s wrong with my eyes?”
Dawn’s cheeks flushed light pink. “I-I-I’ve  never seen anyone with eyes that blue before, they’re like… I don’t know, the eyes of a wolf or something.”
“The eyes of a wolf?” It took everything I had not to fall on the floor laughing.
“Y-yeah, you know, deep and predatory but also…” She went redder then I ever thought possible.
“Also?”
She covered her face with her hands, mumbling into her palms. “sexy.”
I tried as hard as I could to keep from laughing but I could contain it no longer. I burst into a fit of that lasted much more then a minute.

When I had calmed myself I replied. “So what you’re saying is that you find me attractive?”
She just about choked on her hot chocolate. “What? No! I-I’m saying that I think you’re weird.”
I ran a hand through my hair. “I suppose some of my customs could appear quite peculiar.”
She raised an eyebrow. “I thought I heard a bit of an accent, where are you from?”
I chuckled to myself. “No where that you would know.”
Before she could press any further I changed the subject. “I sense that you are distressed in some way.”  
She scoffed, forcing a smile. “No, even if I was, why would I tell you?”
“Perhaps I could assist you, there is always a way out Dawn. But it is never through hurting oneself.”
She averted her gaze. “You’re out of line. You have no idea what’s going on.”
She was completely wrong, I had every idea of what was going on, but how could I tell her that.
Instead of arguing I smiled somberly and stood. “I’m sorry to have upset you,” I placed a small amount of money on the table, to pay for our beverages. “Until we meet again Dawn Cooper.”

I felt absolutely wretched for leaving her during her time of need, but I knew if I tried too hard to help, the Guardians would be alerted, and an irate guardian is the last thing any seraph wants, even one as key as I. Pulling the small piece of rolled up parchment from my coat I tried to concentrate on the job at hand.

Stephen Walker- Perth, Australia- Heart attack.

I groaned inwardly, these last few decades the frequency of heart attacks seemed to be growing. They were also my least favorite to attend, for some reason victims of heart attack struggled to accept their death more then others.  

My next few weeks were tedious; I completed my tasks and went about my usual business. It wasn’t until a month later that I came face to face with Dawn again. She was cradling a mountain of books against her chest, as she hurriedly pushed her way through crowds of people on their way home from work. I watched her for awhile, watched as she struggled to get to her destination, at times almost dropping the books. I fought against the idea of assisting her, it was not my job, if I kept interfering where I was not meant to, it could result in severe consequences, and not just for me. People continued to batter against her tiny frame, acting as if she did not even exist. An emotion I shouldn’t have felt swelled up within me, anger, why was I feeling anger? I lost all reason at that moment and revealed myself. Roughly shoving through the crowds I fell into stride beside her, though she didn’t notice. She was trying much too hard to hold back the tears and screams of anguish that she had been containing for far too long. I gently placed a hand on her shoulder, startling her out of her reverie.
“Dawn, are you ok?” I had never noticed just how small she was compared to me, it helped to convey her fragility.
She jumped, dropping the stack of books at her feet. “Shit, Craven, what are you doing?”
I knelt down and began to restack the books into a neat pile. “It looked as if you could use some assistance.”
She frowned. “Look Craven, that’s kind of you, and I appreciate it but… I don’t even know you. You can’t just come up to me like that.”
“Like what?” I easily supported the weight of the books on one arm.
She kneaded her temples. “Please just leave me be, you scare me.”
“I-I scare you?” My face dropped, a hollowness spreading through my chest.”
Snatching the books off of me she sighed. “I’m sorry, but the fact that you know my last name and what I feel… it’s just too much.”
I gave a small nod, feeling as if I had once again failed at being the shoulder to cry on.

At this point I had given up all hope of being able to help Dawn. It seemed that every time I tried to assist her it encumbered her. So I decided, as much as it would pain me to do so, I would leave her be. The next time I would see her would be when her name turned up on my little list. Which unhappily happened a lot earlier then I had hoped for.

I sat at an old park bench as small droplets of rain sprinkled my hair and clothes. My eyes were shut, my mind elsewhere. I could hear the flapping of wings as two ravens played above my head. I felt two people amble past their life energies strong. It had been an hour since I had checked my list, but something was telling me to enjoy the silence a little longer. After a few more minutes I lazily opened my eyes, wiping droplets of water from my face. Reaching into the large pocket in my trench coat, my hand closed around the thick sheet of parchment. The parchment was spattered with rain as I unfolded it. My breath caught in my chest as I read the name.

Dawn Cooper- Westminster London- Drug Overdose

I read over the loopy script multiple times, fingers tracing the letters of her name. I felt responsible, perhaps if I’d tried harder she’d still be alive. Sluggishly I stood, wiping at my eyes, though I couldn’t tell whether it was rain or tears. I glanced over at the ravens, who had seemingly sensed my distress and landed a few feet from me, cawing frantically. I shook the water from my hair, disliking the way it stuck to my forehead, and made my way to her.

She lay on her back, on the dark cream coloured carpet of her apartment. Her long burgundy hair spread out above her head like a halo. She wore no more then a thin satin nightie which allowed me proper view of the scars covering her upper thighs. I sighed, kneeling down on one knee and gently closing her glassy grey eyes. I tried all I could to keep matters professional, but it was easier said then done. I caressed her cheek with my thumb, tracing the sharp plain of her cheek bone as I knelt down and pressed my lips to her brow. The air around her shimmered, as I guided her soul out of its physical restraints. Her soul took form, a pale ghost like apparition of the body it had once been housed in.
“Craven?” Her voice was soft, reminiscent of a gust of wind.
It took everything I had to not cry. “Dawn, I am here to collect you, and guide you on your way to the next stage of your existence.”
A small smile found its way onto her ghostly face. “I thought there was something odd about you.”
I swallowed hard. “I tried to help you Dawn, even though it’s against my orders.”
Her hand brushed a strand of hair from my eyes, surprising me how corporal her form was. “You did help me, maybe not as much as you hoped, but you did.”
I nodded silently, offering her my arm. It was imperative I tried to keep this professional.
Her arm looped with mine. “You look sadder then me, why?
I glanced at her through the corner of my eye. “I just think I felt a connection to you.”
A smile formed on her face. “You think I’m attractive.”
I looked down at her, looking her over, before smirking. “Maybe a little.”
She laughed standing on her tip toes to touch her lips to mine. The kiss was soft, and loving, and forbidden.
She pulled away slowly, smile on her face. “Don’t tell me I’m going to hell for kissing the grim reaper.”
I chuckled, twirling a strand of her burgundy hair around my finger. “No one goes to hell for loving, no matter who it is they love.”